What Is Your Purpose In Life?

A few years ago, I was asked a specific question. I now realize that I had no idea how to answer that question and what I thought was the correct answer - good job, get married, raise a family was it. That's every young person's "American Dream", right?

Over the course of the past three years, two older people (one of whom I do not communicate with at all anymore) have asked me that question: what is your purpose in life? When I first heard it, I was thinking "whoaaa... how do I answer a question like that? What would the 'correct' answer be so I sound more grown up?". So when that question was first prompted to me, I gave them my honest answer, which at that time was "I don't know". Person #1 told me that if you can't answer that question, then you don't know yourself at all. This person also followed it up with "what are your weaknesses?", if you can't answer that question about yourself, you don't know who you are and what you're doing.

After hearing that, it made me ponder for a couple years about whether that was really true or not. A year after, I was approached by person #2 with the same question. What is your purpose? By this time, I already had my textbook answer ready, "love God, love people", right? Little did I know, this time around, my eyes would be opened to things I never thought was possible before. What started out as a cop out answer, "love God, love people" has suddenly become my drive in life, my purpose!

What exactly does that mean? How easy is it to love God? Well, He is perfect, so how can you hate anything that's perfect right? Sure, loving God is easy... so now, time for part 2. What about loving people? I can easily love my friends and others who are easy to like. But what has occured to me as a huge challenge (and I am still greatly challenged right now and still working on) is how do you love people who (in my eyes) are unloveable? You know what I'm talking about... the socially awkward, the blunt ones, people with "less class" than you, how do you love them? How do you love them as yourself? And how does that fit into everyone's typical life goals of good job, find your soul mate, and raise a family?

There were many things I had which made me happy... at the time. Sooner, rather than later, what brought me joy at the moment slowly slithered away. The new computer I bought at the moment was nothing more than a machine to me. The snowboard I brought is slowly collecting dust in the corner of the house. All the clothes I have will soon go away as fashion trends come and go. What exactly have I done in my life to make a difference? And the only thing I could think of was relationships with others. Learning to love people when they're difficult, and just loving people who I never would've given the time of day a few years back.

I have realized that life is not about money. You can have all the money in the world but still feel unloved and empty inside. Throughout this year, I found out that the times I feel most loved and at ease with things are the times when I'm doing things not for myself, but for others. Yes, I can get impatient at times, but learning to love people (a huge challenge most of the time for me), has helped me see things in a clearer light. What exactly led me to this revelation? I'm really not sure... it could be a bunch of different series of events put together. One thing for sure though, everything seems a little more clear when you realize your purpose (your map) as you continue steering on toward your goals.

Stealing Kids

This past week, it feels like I've been surrounded by little kids left and right (so when I refer to little kids, I mean just weeks born infants to kindergarteners). Just seeing someone hold a little baby looks so cute (minus the whole pooping and feeding thing) and fun! Today when I was walking to the office, there were these kindergarteners playing outside and they're just so tiny (compared the the 4th/5th graders I'm used to seeing). Maybe it's the scorching heat which is leaving weird thoughts in my head - but how great would it be to steal one of those kids? A cute one (of course)!

I then think about what happens when they start growing. Are kids considered cute at the age of 9-10 now? I'm thinking of my group of kids, I can't imagine myself saying they're cute, like how little kids are cute. But they sure are entertaining to talk to, especially the group of 5th grade boys who tell me all their stories they failed to tell me when I was still their teacher last year when we went on our Sacramento overnight field trip.

And what about the age when they're in middle school and it's probably not considered "cool" to be talking to an adult when it's not necessary? So, is it really worth it to steal a kid? Maybe I should just fly to Neverland and keep them at a certain age so they'll never have to grow up, and possibly learn to fly as well.

Around end of high school to college years is also a pretty cool age as well. They're finally slowly trying to find adulthood and have all these ideas and theories on what it's like. Little do they know, it's nothing like what it's like in the movies.

Back to my original post, I would want a kid. It seems so fun... but I guess for the time being, I'll stick to being with Ms. Piggy (the world's most unloyal dog) and playing with her when no one else is home.

The end of an era

Today marks the end of something very very special, but it's okay cause I'm a trooper.